Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother

Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother This fiercely honest and funny book answers questions no one else dares to ask What if I don t like the kid I get Will my child ever feel like mine If this is the happiest day of my life why am I so

  • Title: Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother
  • Author: Jana Wolff
  • ISBN: 9780836221862
  • Page: 308
  • Format: Hardcover
  • This fiercely honest and funny book answers questions no one else dares to ask What if I don t like the kid I get Will my child ever feel like mine If this is the happiest day of my life, why am I so sad Will she want the baby back Will I want to return him The book garnered rave reviews from Betty Jean Lifton, Jamie Lee Curtis, Cathy Guisewite, Adoptive Families ofThis fiercely honest and funny book answers questions no one else dares to ask What if I don t like the kid I get Will my child ever feel like mine If this is the happiest day of my life, why am I so sad Will she want the baby back Will I want to return him The book garnered rave reviews from Betty Jean Lifton, Jamie Lee Curtis, Cathy Guisewite, Adoptive Families of America, San Francisco Chronicle, and hundreds of readers New, revised edition now in paper.

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      Published :2019-08-26T22:24:10+00:00

    About "Jana Wolff"

    1. Jana Wolff

      Jana Wolff Is a well-known author, some of his books are a fascination for readers like in the Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother book, this is one of the most wanted Jana Wolff author readers around the world.

    670 thoughts on “Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother”

    1. As an adoptive mom, this book was exactly what I needed, and I wish I had found it year ago, before we adopted. The author shares her feelings and fears so honestly, and helps all of us other adoptive moms feel like we aren't the only ones who feel that way. So often we feel like we must be the only people who are worried about loving our adopted children, or if we will feel like a "real" parent, or if adoption really is the best choice, or how to build a connection with a child who doesn't shar [...]


    2. In a culture that idealizes pregnancy, it's hard to be an adoptive mom. In a culture that increasingly idealizes adoption (see: Angelina--whom we love doubly because she's altruistic AND fertile), Jana Wolff's candor is refreshing. Although I didn't relate to her feeling that adoption was inherently a second choice for any parent (even as a kid, I wanted to adopt a kid), I imagine that someday I'll relate to her envy and resentment of her baby's birth mom; her slow-to-bloom love for this strange [...]


    3. The author of this book so bitter and cynical, the source of which is her infertility and being "forced" to adopt. I want to say that her honesty is refreshing, but truthfully, this book just made me angry that her bitter words were given a platform. I pray that her adopted child never reads these pages.


    4. Lighthearted yet honest in her feelings, Wolff brings up all manner of thoughts that go through your head when you are entering the realm of adoption. This book really made me feel like I wasn't the only one who might wonder some of these things!


    5. Memoirs are incredibly personal, and it's challenging to write one that is both honest and yet doesn't throw friends and family members too far under the bus. I felt that Ms. Wolff had a good balance here of honesty and writing ability, but this entire book bothered me.I have obviously not lived the author's life, but we do have some similarities. Unlike her, I was able to birth a healthy, biological son, but obstacles with pregnancy and delivery led us to choosing a different path for future ch [...]


    6. I highlighted the hell out of this book. It is a must-read for anyone considering adoption, especially interracial adoption. Wolff is brutally honest, and I mean that not as a fall-back cliche but truly, brutally so. It's not many mothers who are brave enough to admit that they didn't love their children immediately, adoptive or biological. It's not many adoptive mothers who will admit jealousy and resentment of the birth mother, and even less who will admit that for them, adoption was a second [...]


    7. This book is about a mother, her struggles in becoming a parent of a child through adoption and an interracial family. It is a story about the benefits and anxieties associated with domestic open adoption following infertility. She talks candidly about both infertility and adoption. I found this book to be a very quick and easy read. She wans't trying to lecture me on how to behave, just old it like it was for her. It was so nice to hear in print from a mother that has gone through many of the t [...]


    8. This is a classic 'don't judge a book by it's cover,' because the title of this book suggests a different tone than it really is. And the cover picture of the copy I read was pretty lame.I felt extremely validated during this very quick read (practically one sitting and that with an infant in my arms!). She addresses feelings that are real and honest, without being overly cynical. Her feelings don't all resolve to nice neat packages in the end, but the overall feeling is positive. She sees adopt [...]


    9. This is a very honest and straightforward book written by a mother who (along with her husband) adopted her son domestically through open adoption. She is very open about her journey and the wonderful parts, strange parts, and sorrowful parts of the adoption process. It's a short book and a quick read. The author provides insight into the cognitive process of coming to know and love an adopted child and does not shy away from revealing thoughts and feelings that others might consider wrong or ta [...]


    10. Though this book is on every recommended reading list for prospective adoptive parents, I put off purchasing it as I knew it dealt with issues of infertility and domestic adoption - neither of which affected me personally. Oh, how pleased I am that I finally ordered this gem! This should be required reading for adoptive parents as it delves into taboo topics and shared feelings than only fellow PAPs can understand. I'll be earmarking chapters of this for my husband as well. Definitely a must-rea [...]


    11. Now this is a personal account that I can totally relate to, not because I have experienced what she experienced, but because I so relate to her thoughts & feelings about different aspects of the adoption process. She talks about things that are almost taboo, and it is really refreshing to get that kind of honest account while still showing that, ultimately, it was all worth it. Anyone who is researching adoption or interested in any aspect of the adoption process would find this an interest [...]


    12. As my husband and I wait for a birthmother to pick us, somedays we think we're going crazy. And some days we think do we really want to do this to ourselves. Loved this book's honesty about this whole very surreal, weird experience. If you know John and I and want to understand how we feel right now, I recommend this book. She says the things that we never say to anyone but each other,but wish we could.


    13. This is a pretty good book that. The author shares her inner thoughts (not so inner anymore, are they?) about aspects of her open adoption of a child of a race different from hers. It's a quick read; the chapters are basically brief essays on each topic. I expected more from the description -- I thought she would share other perspectives.The book is a little hard to track down. I got it through interlibrary loan (yay, interlibrary loan!).


    14. I felt like the first half of this book could have been written by me- and probably all other adoptive moms out there. It was so true, and sad, and funny all at the same time. The second half was a bit different from my situation, but good none the less. I wish all my friends and family would read this to understand a little bit what adoptive mothers go through. It was a quick read, took only a couple of hours.


    15. The adoption agency my husband and I are working with "prescribed" this book as required reading, since we're considering transracial adoption. I think this book is impressive in its candor about adoption in general and the forming of transracial families, in particular. A huge resource for future (or current) adoptive parents as well as an educational resource for those curious about how transracial adoption works in the real world. Highly recommended.


    16. This is a really amazing book. I learned about what adoptive parents are dealing with their insecurities, issues, hopes, and fears. There are several chapters on racism not the hateful kind, but the kind of unknowing racism that most people have.Jana Wolff's humor is priceless. She is clever and witty.This book is a short, interesting read. It will open your eyes!


    17. Completely fantastic! It is so great to hear someone deal with adoption so openly - the good parts and the bad. Her humor is just bordering on irreverent, but doesn't cross the line: the beautiful things are still beautiful. Also an excellent treatment of trans racial adoption issues.


    18. I could not put this book down.It was really gripping to read how an adoptive mother learned about the unquestioned/unremarked upon racism through the experiences of her son.Very thought provoking about the realities of adopting a child of color.


    19. Jana Wolff got into my head and truly understood and bravely verbalizes the tough and sometimes shame inducing aspects of being an adoptive mom. A good read that helped me feel like I am not alone. She courageously addressed the adoptive mom woes and worries in a humorous manner.


    20. This book hit home on so many of my own thoughts and feelings and I found myself almost sobbing at times. However, the author is hilarious and I often laughed out loud as well. An excellent, very quick read especially for those touched by adoption.


    21. I read this book in one night. I loved it, Wolff was honest and endearing and didnt make me feel nervous or anxious about adopting. While I dont think I will choose a completely open adoption, this book gives great insight into people that do. Wonderfu.


    22. Would call it a must read for parents who are adopting - and their friends and family. Expresses a lot of the questions and thoughts that roll around in an adoptive parent's head - the thoughts they can't share out loud.


    23. This is a great book--which definitely made me tear up openly on a plane. This is perfect for me right now because it addressed all of the questions about adoption it doesn't seem right to ask people, but I really wanted to know the answers to!


    24. I loved the way Wolff takes the reader through the adoption journey - from infertility treatments to parenting - with complete openess and honesty. A must read for anyone wishing to know more about what it means to become a mother through adoption.


    25. Captured ALMOST everything I felt related to the struggle of becoming a mother. It was so good to read someone else's words, so well written, that related so completely to my own story.


    26. This was a fabulous books. If you are at all touched by the world of adoption, it hits home. The insecurities, the self-doubt, everything.



    27. Although her adoption situation was a bit different than mine, what I found in this book is permission to feel a range of emotions about the whole adoption experience.




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